The fight scenes were utterly ridiculous, in the way that a small handful of people fought off huge hordes of zombies ... er, white walkers, over the course of what felt like 4-5 minutes. They would have overrun that small band of guys in about 10-15 seconds. Instead, we were treated to a long, long, LONG, overly dramatic fight scene.

Jon falling below the ice into the frigid water ... and gasping to the surface and surviving? Oh, please. People who fall into ice water, with two zombies ... er white walkers, hanging on them, die.

Then, Benjen showing up out of nowhere, right in the nick of time? Please.

Then, Benjen dramatically saying, "There's no time" and staying behind? Uh, yeah, there's plenty of time. Takes about 1-2 seconds to hop right on the back of that horse and ride off with Jon. Sheesh. Instead, we're treated to a long, dreamy slow-moving sequence where the zombies ... er, white walkers, approach Benjen and kill him. Never mind that he could have run 10 laps around the horse in the time it took the zombies ... er, white walkers, to reach him.

And Gendry running at Usain Bolt speed ("All that cardio from three years of rowing has clearly paid off"), and the ravens and Dany flying at light speed to make sure the dragons arrive in time, before the 10-15 seconds have elapsed, and the zombies have overrun our small band of intrepid heroes? Please. I know GRRM likes to bend time, but give me a break.

And the chains the zombies used to haul the dragon out of the lake ... where'd they come from? Sheesh.

Lastly, Jon calling Daenerys "Dany." Eye roll. Dany saying tremblingly, "I hope I deserve it" ... what, the bad-ass Mother of Dragons is suddenly feeling vulnerable?

Just a bad, bad episode. Sloppily done, over the top, and insulting.

The dialogue among our little traveling band was humorous, and the thought of an undead dragon is cool, but really, overall the episode was BAD.